Hello friends,

hope you are well.

Work is good and challenging and rewarding.

I've been enjoying going for walks on the sunset with colleague to do deep chats on work & life.

A lot of conversation happened here that I thought of sharing.

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A colleague just got promoted.

Confident guy. In a new, stable relationship. Spend weekend with his serious golf hobby.

“Happy, no?”, I teased.

“Yeah, it’s nice… and “

I can notice some consideration on his face.

So I asked him, out of the blue.

“Can I ask you a question? The purpose isn’t for you to answer. It’s to bring something out.”

He nodded.

I asked: “What do you need to be happy?”

He went blank. That 404 moment where the mind just stops.

Then he replied:

“I need to change my attitude toward happiness.”

(thoughtful guy, no?)

We’re sitting there with this beautiful lake view, perfect afternoon, and he realizes he doesn’t know how to just be happy.

He continued: “But it’s hard.”

I caught that. “What if instead of ‘it’s hard,’ you said ‘I’m not familiar with it yet’?

Language reflects our view.

I shared with him a new language.

“I’m getting used to being happy.”

That’s the practice.

Here is the paradox we are both learning to embrace.

If you are not chasing the next achievement, you don’t have drive and hunger, you are out.

AND

you can chase the future while appreciating what we have.

It’s not either/or.

It is both/and.

Getting used to contentment is like learning to dive deeper in the ocean.

At first it’s overwhelming, then you adapt, then it becomes natural.

I learned this question “What do you need to be happy?” from a master coach.

It’s not meant to be answered. It’s an invitation.

A pointer to a state of mind we’re all still learning.

In our achievement-oriented world, there’s always something external to chase. And that’s okay.

Just don’t forget the ongoing practice.

Getting used to being happy..

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Lots of love,

Khuyen

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How's your practice? Let me know.

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